Invidious

By -

TW: Rape 

She'd known him her whole life. They'd grown up together and she believed that they shared a bond that no one could break. But yet, why were his calloused hands suddenly so new to her? Why was she wishing they weren't on her body? They traced imaginary circles and lines and gently groomed her with more care and affection than she'd been used to.

"There's nothing weird in what he's doing." She comforted herself. Or tried to at least. She'd never been this close to his face before and the withered acne scars and scratch marks she'd inflicted became more prominent. She darted her glance to his eyes where she hoped to find solace. But she couldn't even find the same person in them.

It didn't feel like all the other times she'd spend with him.

This wasn't him.

He wouldn't push his body against hers like this.

He wouldn't look at her with this kind of lust.

He wouldn't hungrily kiss her this way either.

In fact, he was stealing away her first kiss.

She was only seven

A rainy day had left them nothing to do. So, they'd decided to have an afternoon siesta. He'd suggested it.
He said he was feeling sleepy. But he didn't want to sleep with her.
He wanted to sleep with her.

His hot breath down her neck made her extremely uncomfortable but judging by his grip around her arms, she knew she couldn't protest. Couldn't scream or shout or even beg him to stop. She knew him too well.

He'd get angry and getting him riled up wouldn't end up nicely. So he kept kissing her and she just helplessly let it happen.

At 7, she thought it ended at kissing.
He suddenly stopped and held her close to his chest, suffocating her in the process. And then he gently lifted and places her in the bed, while he got up and straddled her. He completely avoided her helpless gaze and instead, scanned her from top to bottom. He had both his hands holding down her frail arms and she tried to muster up the courage to ask him to let go because they were hurting her by now. But not knowing what was going to happen next drained every bit of that courage.

And then she found out.

He let go of her arms, bent down, kissed her in the forehead and left the room without another word.

And that was how two people who once shared a womb couldn't share a room anymore.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Rejuvenation (?)

By -
One of the most important things I've learnt over the past 4 years is that you need to be in peace to read and write. You need to have calm to create. At least so is the case for me. I needed to feel calm before I could plunge myself into another world. Imagine another reality. Create another narrative. And today, after a long time, I am reading again. I am writing again. This fleeting moment of peace, while there's chaos all around me, feels like a joke to me. How am I able to write and read again? How am I able to put my thoughts on paper, unadulterated and unabridged? It's shocking. But also a pleasant surprise. Because I'd longed for it for a very long time. To feel what the characters in the story I read feel. To be able to show the world how I feel through my words. It was suffocation, not being able to do either of them. To have my creative mouth sealed shut. And now, I am able to whisper and let people know that maybe, I'm not dead just yet.
Read more

New Act

By -
I’ve done this before, you know? A second chance for the hundredth time And each time I begin I hope I finally get a win Tidy up and put a smile Beat the race by a mile Because this new beginning Is the closest thing to another life Do I reinvent myself To be someone entirely new? Or do I stay true to my own And take the risk of being alone? Is it deceiving to choose one over the other Or normal to make yourself a clone? But as daunting it can all seem I sought this clean slate to redeem So even if I end up not being the best Or being different from the rest As long as I don't end up in the past I’ll keep trudging on until the next cast And of course, it matters that you surround With the best you can be around A new fish in this giant school Hoping I won’t be a fool But I tell myself to calm down And let matters go to town Because after all, the future Is all we do now to nurture.
Read more

Cogitation

By -
"Why do you like me?" She has heard herself asking this to a lot of people over the course of time. It wasn't reserved just for her suitors. All her loved ones heard this question a few times over. It was an urge to know why she was deemed worthy to be in that person's life. It was a desperation to understand why they didn't discard her when she proved herself useless. It confused her greatly why some people chose to remain loving to her while some others didn't. She asked herself if this confusion implied that that's the way she viewed others. Did she disregard them when they stopped benefiting her? Not really... She stopped trying to hold on when holding on was difficult though. She stopped being the one who loved fiercely because she had no fierceness left inside her. She loved the ones who loved her but those who were indifferent found themselves losing her slowly yet surely. Now they knew about each other because of what they chose to share with the w...
Read more