Heart on Sleeve Writings

TW: Rape  She'd known him her whole life. They'd grown up together and she believed that they shared a bond that no one could break. But yet, why were his calloused hands suddenly so new to her? Why was she wishing they weren't on her body? They traced imaginary circles and lines and gently groomed her with more care and affection than she'd been used to. "There's nothing weird in what he's doing." She comforted herself. Or tried to at least. She'd never been this close to his face before and the withered acne scars and scratch marks she'd inflicted became more prominent. She darted her glance to his eyes where she hoped to find solace. But she couldn't even find the same person in them. It didn't feel like all the other times she'd spend with him. This wasn't him. He wouldn't push his body against hers like this. He wouldn't look at her with this kind of lust. He wouldn't hungrily kiss her this way ei...

"Crumple down my love fall upon my arms I'll hold on forever until my last breath flees." But all those words and all those actions never mean a thing if I'm not there to feel the love that he so freely gives. Time escapes. We grow up. I'm no longer me. The world changed me. And against all odds it somehow broke him too. And lovers turned to lonely strangers eyes that couldn't meet. And all is lost, love-lorn souls and all I've ever gained. Remains since blocked returns to dust and all I've ever gained he took with him forever mine is now Forever his.

We were tangled between sheets, non existent clothes separating us. I could feel his heart beating faster over the proximity of our encounters. I got up and sat by his side, the bed spread crinkling with each swift motion. I didn't bother covering up myself anymore. What did physical vulnerability have to do with someone you've opened up to? Someone you've told your darkest secrets to and someone you  loved  love, even if the feeling wasn't mutual. But he kept looking over to me. Even though far from aphrodisiacal, my body was awe worthy. Far too many men strengthened that claim. But one look and his eyes raced to find mine. It was a look seeking approval. To mentally fuck me? Is that what he had in his mind? I gave him a half hearted smile but he understood it clear enough. A sad smile overshadowed his lust. He looked away as I pulled the sheet up to my chest. "I need you, Nate. I want to be loved. By you and only you. Or am I just not good enough? I know I wo...

Never to have left Never to have wept Always by me But never mine Promises unkempt Love unsaid Secrets pile up Conversations thin down Words lose their value Actions sear their marks And hidden tears turn to withering scars I am forever his And him? Forever hers

Author's Note: An ending seemed like the perfect beginning. _______________________________ Do not forgive for all that has unwound because I pulled the yarn when you always told me not to. It's better that we part while we can still think back and have more good memories than bad. To give up on you was never my intention but we both know that this is what is best for us. To leave without a word of farewell. It'll always hurt. At least it will for me. But I'll always be grateful for all that you've done for me. For building me up and for saving my life. But things have changed. So let me leave before I undo the things you were a catalyst to. Let me commemorate the presence of you in my life before they criticize you for the absence of me in theirs. Know that you did well in things in life and know that my presence wouldn't have helped you. Don't fight the choices I made because you knew, in the darkest alley of your mind,...